Yes I bought a Dr. Who Coffee Mug from The Unemployed Philosophers’ Guild
TERRANCE GAVAN – EDITOR
Why is this important? What? Oh. Right. Okay then, why is it important that I bought a mug from the Unemployed Philosophers’ Guild?
Simple. I am by my philanthropic donation to the cause keeping several British Philosophy perfessers off the fecking dole. This is a good thing.
Also. I like the good Doctor, who is an above average philospher in his own right.
I realized this early on in my Dr. Who idolatry. When he said “Fuck the Dahleks… and the bad CGI they rode in on! Fuck those Dahleks.”
What is really cool about this mug though is that when you pour coffee in it…. something transcendent happens…
It must be hot coffee… mind you… please and thanks.
When the hot liquid hits the cup… the Tardis that was on the ground slowly vanishes. I am not making this up. And it magically appears in deep space on the other side of the mug.
I did not know this when I bought the fucking mug. I just thought I was supporting my ridiculous mug collecting habit and serving the world by keeping philosophy alive.
So here are both pictures I took.
And now the utterly mesmerizing second vantage point of the Tardis appearing in Deep Space.
This came, as I said, as a complete surprise because I bought two mugs. One for Jackie and one for me for Easter.
This mug comes with a drawback. Or warnings.
Do not scour this mug with abrasive cloths or brushes.
Do not immerse or soak in water for an extended period.
Do not place it in a dishwasher.
If you like it? Please write a blog piece about it because we’re like… Unemployed fucking Philosophers and we need the money… Because Britain is bereft of opportunities in Liberal Arts and MacDonalds does not hire out of work Doctors of Philosophy!
So I am doing my part. I have written the blog piece about the cute cup. I will be spending a lot of time caring for this cup because… well… I can’t put the fucking thing in the dishwasher.
At some point I know what will happen.
My Dr Who Mug will get left on the counter and make its way to the sink or the dishwasher.
After that happens who knows where the fucking Tardis will go.
I hope it will remain static in one state or another. But the meagre literature accompanying the mug does not tell us what will happen if the mug is mistreated.
I would like to know, of course. And now I will be ever on the verge of trying it on, as a British philosopher might say.
Temptation will nag and nudge at my noodle. And one day I will probably try it out. Just to see what will happen. I will blame it on my memory… or my dog.
The philosophic implications are gargantuan. Did I do it on purpose. Or did I simply let things slide.
Okay so… thus troubled I went to the source.
I went to their website.
Here’s a scoop.
[blockquote cite=”Unemployed Philosophers Guild Web” type=”left, center, right”]
Are your mugs microwavable, and are they Dishwasher safe?
All of the mugs are microwavable. For the disappearing variety of mug we don’t suggest machine washing, as they may disappear forever, but for the regular mugs like the Math Mug and Shakespearean Insults, you may safely machine wash.
Also I found out that their area code is 718. A bloody Brooklyn, NY address. They are not British after all.
And lo and alas and alacking some more keyboard clacking I found other travesty! Yoiks and Egad.
This on their FAQ Page:
If you are really unemployed, how come you have a job?
In fact, we are employed, just not as philosophers.
Are you really philosophers?
Not for a living. But we do philosophize.
What have we learned? From this rather Quixotic and fateful traipse through the Philosophers Guild?
Well. In the time it took to pen this lugubrious bit (721 words and counting) my Tardis has returned from earth. My coffee is still lukewarm. Grounding the Tardis somewhere on the cobblestones of a London burb.
More coffee says I.
Lookeee Here! Tardis is back on earth.
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